Something that I need to get off my chest

This is slightly morbid and I probably think about this more than most people do.

Given my health issues though I think it is understandable. I often wonder when and how I will eventually die. 

Of course, I can never be certain of how or when I will die. This is why I am so grateful for every day of my life. 

On the one hand, I am looking forward to my death and hopefully being able to be reunited with my family and friends who passed away before me. 

I don't want to live forever, but neither do I want to die tomorrow. 89 feels like a good age to go out. However, I will stay alive as long as I can be mentally and physically OK.

Unlike most people my age, I have prepared extensively for my eventual death. I am an organ donor, I have a DNR, I have made my living Will, my funeral and burial arrangements, medical power of attorney and I have prewritten my obituary. 

I will only accept euthanasia if I get diagnosed with a brain disorder where I would lose my memory and independence. 

I do not want to be a burden on my family and slowly waste away. Any other disease though and I would fight it until the end. I don't want Jenny to have to stress about anything. That is why I have prepared all of this in advance. 

I hope that both Jenny and Eliana outlive me but I am not ready to kick the bucket tomorrow. 

I don't know how or when I will die but I hope it will be quick and painless. I had an ex roommate of mine die suddenly at only 49 years old. He died alone in his apartment in Africa. Far away from his family in Canada.

He had no wife or kids and his parents outlived him. I am very lucky not to have that be my fate. Eliana will be my legacy and God willing, I will live to see my grandkids and potentially my great grandchildren. 

I hope that I don't die tomorrow, but if I do then I will be happy with the life I have lead. I couldn't ask for much more. The good and the bad have shaped me into who I am today. 

Even if I could change something about my life I wouldn't change a thing. Everything has happened for a reason. 

I just want to remind everyone reading this to be sure and take advantage of every day that you are given because none of us knows how long that we have left. 

Til next time, Tyler